Wallace the Cat
2004-02-24 - 9:59 p.m.

Once upon a time, there lived a tiger named Wallace. Now, Wallace was a very cautious cat. He didn’t like to drink water or to drive cars, mostly because his lithe, catlike feet wouldn't reach the broad, rubber like pedals. He also didn’t like rice cakes or Methodists. He was a very amoral cat.

My NBAA Day entry...

One day, while he was being snobby and catlike, he saw a small rat running into a small hole on the small wall. After he finished eating his truffle (the preferred snack of modern felines worldwide), he gave a brief thought to chasing the mouse. However, he decided to ride his motorcycle instead.

As he was tooling through a field of azaleas, he hit a large bump, and, upon waking from the inevitable blackout, found himself in the lair of Bob the Duck. Bob threaten him with a fierce hunger, but Wallace was unafraid. Since he was many times bigger than Bob, he ate him, and was sore full.

He was so full that he didn’t eat any more truffles.

That was mostly because he was killed in a head on collision with a crow in a Cadillac on the way home.

Woe be the death of Wallace the Cat.